At its final meeting of 2025, the Estes Park Book Club for Mortals met to discuss not a book but a problem.
“When Nobody Wants Your Stuff, What Do They Want?” is a program presented from time to time by library volunteer Mindy Rickard.
You can assume that many of your relatives will want your money when you die, but Rickard recommended thinking creatively about history and memorials.
She suggested perhaps skipping the immediate generation you leave behind and thinking about the future 50 or even 100 years from now. What would you like those distant relatives to have of yours or to know about you?
You could leave a book of memories and photos, for instance. Or you could place a memorial bench by the river or a plaque on a house. Or you could dive into genealogy and become the family detective, leaving a well-researched family tree.
Probably the one thing you don’t want to do is leave a house full of “stuff.”
Rickard said that at one time, she and her husband had two homes and lots of things they had collected and loved. But they had no children and wanted to downsize, which they did.
“Now we have a sense of peace, not worrying about those ‘things,’” she said.
Rickard reminded those present and online that the younger generation is made up largely of people who live in smaller spaces and are used to more disposable furniture, not the six-piece heavy oak dining room sets that Baby Boomers might have been used to.
She offered practical advice for those who want to declutter but find it hard to accomplish. Thrift shops, of course, take many things. But drama departments at high schools and universities also take all kinds of things, from clothes to sets of china.
Rickard also urged downsizers and declutterers not to wait too long.
“We had boxes and boxes of pictures,” she said. “But by the time we went through them, my Dad’s memory had faded, and he could not identify people in the photos.”
Rickard suggests leaving the next generation an “ethical will,” which is different from a legal last will and testament. Common in the Jewish faith, an ethical will passes along thoughts, memories, and descriptions of a life and culture, including necessarily the ethics of the person who writes it. It might include a personal history describing one’s academic and work life, most meaningful experiences, favorite things, falling in love, religious or political views, or hopes for the future.
Rickard, who has a degree in gerontology from the University of Northern Colorado, is a facilitator for the Book Club for Mortals, whose members have discussed end-of-life issues from the practical to the philosophical.
One of the issues she addresses is advance care planning.
“What are your wishes?” she asked. As you age, do you want to stay in your home, downsize, or move to a care facility? The library has an advance care planning kit complete with forms to help you navigate the process.
“I will walk you through and do all your forms at no charge,” Rickard said.
Her talk highlighted an important aspect of aging that can be overlooked: communication. Communicating your desires for the distribution of your things, your history, and your final goodbyes can be a beneficial way to go.
The next book club meeting will discuss the “Mayo Clinic on Healthy Aging” on Jan. 8 at the Estes Valley Library.
Who: Book Club for Mortals
What: Discussion of “Mayo Clinic on Healthy Aging”
When: Jan. 8, 2026, 10:15 a.m. Book club meets on the second Thursday of each month.
Where: Estes Valley Library
Why: The club’s focus for the year will be on living a healthy life